Hello everyone!!! I am very excited to share with you all this month! At the end of last year, I was in prayer about my direction and what topics I should cover. My instructions were to just meet Him and I would get what I need. I am sure this is going to be an interesting journey as things are continuously unfolding in my life! So each month, things will be new for all of us I am sure. I hope you are ready for the ride!!! Let’s get to it!

February 11th, 2012 the world mourned the loss of our beloved Whitney Houston. I will never forget I was at a wedding when I got the news. It was devastating as she was a truly an icon. She had so much music that I had grown to love. One of my favorites as a kid was “I wanna dance with somebody!” But the first one that came to mind the night of her passing was “The greatest love of all.” I loooove it!! Recently that song came to mind as it is very relevant to me in this season of my life.

The song talks about how learning to love yourself is the greatest love of all. There is just one area in which I have to disagree with Ms. Whitney, and that is when she says that learning to love yourself is easy to achieve. It does not come easy to everyone! I remember last year this time I was working through some things in counseling and I asked my friend “How can I learn how to love myself at this point in my life?” I was truly confused and struggling. I felt that if I had not grown to do it in all this time, that I couldn’t do it effectively. Although I am continuing do some soul work to discover the root issues preventing my personal breakthrough, I was able to get to a place where I feel that I deserve to feel that love. One of the issues that we have talked about previously was my dissatisfaction with my weight. I recently posted on social media that I have lost over 50 pounds since May 2020. Not only have I dropped the physical weight, but I have been able to drop emotional and mental weight as well. Yes, that was an external change, but that was the root of most of my internal issues. I feel so much better for it, but not just physically, it goes so far beyond weight. I surprise myself everyday because I am not the same and I must say that I am sooo happy about that! Now, this was just my example. You will have to figure out what you need to do to have your own personal breakthrough.

I do have a scripture that God highlighted to me in reference to this inner love. It is found in 1 Peter 3:3-4(ERV). It says: “It is not fancy hair, gold jewelry, or fine clothes that should make you beautiful.  No, your beauty should come from inside you—the beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit. That beauty will never disappear. It is worth very much to God.” I had it all wrong. I would place emphasis on the outer beauty, which is great! I still do love to look good. However, if that inner woman is in shambles, no matter how many compliments you get they will just bounce off. One day I saw a coworker that I had not seen in a while. The first time she saw me, she said I looked pretty and she liked my green pants. When she walked by me again she said “You just look happy.” I said thanks, but when I got back to my desk I thought that was the best compliment I have received in years! That was the result of the inner work bubbling out for others to see. Ladies, you know once we get home and take off the makeup, wigs, jewelry, and bra, we are stripped of the fleeting beauty we once had just minutes ago. Proverbs 31:30 AMP tells us “Charm and grace are deceptive, and [superficial] beauty is vain, But a woman who fears the LORD [reverently worshiping, obeying, serving, and trusting Him with awe-filled respect], she shall be praised.” The beauty of our spirit will remain because we are rooted in God! But we have to cultivate it, we have to reinforce it, and we have to get around others that understand the journey and encourage it! This is where the self care, self love, and nurturing your soul comes in.

I was recently reading a book and it mentioned celebrating yourself. I told you guys that I was going to be intentional about that this year! I decided to write down what that meant to me. I even researched self care and celebrating oneself and found so many new ideas. My goal is things that nurture my soul. It can be anything from taking a bubble bath, reading a good book, taking yourself to dinner or brunch, sitting in peace with candles lit and listening for God to speak, getting pampered, and you would be amazed what walking in nature can do. This has changed my life! I do what makes my heart sparkle and nurtures me internally. I am intentional about spending time with me and getting to know who God created me to be. This is promoting that inner love. I have found that I am fun, I am good company, and I protect my alone time. It may be a little harder for some depending on your life and obligations, but we make time for what we want. Carve out some time to nurture yourself.

Another form of self care that I discovered was a good cry. I DO NOT LIKE CRYING!! I know that’s not exactly healthy, baby steps ok?! I was listening to a podcast recently called Brown Girl Self Care and she said crying is like a shower for the soul. Now around the time I listened, I had been dealing with a few emotional blows. I was trying not to allow them to dismantle all of the hard work I had done, determined that those things were not going to get me off of my square. But when I heard her statement, I realized that I had been doing a lot of “work” and work is messy. Construction sites are messy. They produce a lot of debris. I realized that I needed to release so that I could wash away that debris. I did the work, but I left the debris in a pile over in the corner. When construction is complete, the area has to be cleansed in order to see the beauty of that new construction. It is also important to remove the old things that no longer add value to this new creation.

Crying doesn’t fix the problems, but it does feel like a cleansing. It is practicing self care, self love, and nurturing my soul by acknowledging my emotions, not allowing them to just fester and create more issues. Self care involves honesty with yourself, no matter how you feel. Being free to express yourself in the happy moments, sad moments, silly moments, and the sexy moments too girl! If I had not implemented these practices in my life, the emotional blows would have been pretty detrimental to me. Just like in the past. People and life experiences can cause our feelings and emotions to sway, but it is so important to be grounded in the love of God and the love you have about the jewel that you are. I am just thankful that I can experience the newness that God is doing in me and through me in these scenarios. I may not agree or understand, but they will be used for His glory. Resting in God is another form of self care, self love, and it definitely nurtures your soul. I have to rest there when my mind and heart are weary due to the things happening around me.

So sis, embrace your inner beauty, get to know who you are so that you can present that woman to the world. A BEAUTIFUL creation, full of light, love, and joy. That is what will last. That is what matters to God. That is what I want people to see when they see me. Not just a cute outfit, jewelry, or hair. I want the love of God to radiate from me. Others can benefit from that light that comes from us through God. When we love ourselves, it is easier to love others and accept love from others. We all need to gravitate towards a space of loving ourselves and embracing our true beauty. I like it here, it feels so amazing! It is not selfish for us to invest in healing and loving ourselves, EVERY.SINGLE.PART. The return on that investment will last eternally and pleases God. Nurturing the Holy Spirit inside of us that produces the fruit of love that conquers all and shows us how wonderful we are. That is the greatest love of all.

Father, we thank you for who you have created us to be. Beautiful vessels created to carry the light of your love and glory. Peacemakers, world changers, trailblazers, nurturers, and encouragers. Help us to bring those attributes inward. Help us to give ourselves the grace, love, peace, and joy that we provide to others. Allow us to fill our love tanks with a genuine love, care, and kindness. Shower us with your precious love in those moments where we are shaky in our thoughts of who we really are. Allow us to have the tenacity to seek you for our identity so that when the world seeks to steal it, we can rely on the seal of your word on our hearts. Help us to keep your affirmations in our minds and on our lips. Thank you for helping us to find this great love, cultivate this great love, and show this great love. Amen! Love you all to pieces!!