Hey there LOVELY people! I can’t believe it is already October! Hope you all are making it a great one! This month we are talking about emerging. I have a thing for the thesaurus and a dictionary so I will look up a word in a hot second to make sure I am using it correctly.  I took a look at the definition of emerging and I saw some powerful phrases. I found “to move out or away”, “to surface”, “to come into view”. My favorite definition was “to come to the end of a difficult period or experience.” I was like Yaaaaassssss! That’s what I was looking for!

When you are in the process of emerging from something, that is a very pivotal time in your life. You have to set boundaries! I spent so much of my life in the dark, it was difficult for some to handle me moving in my light. This light changed the way I carried myself, the way I spoke, the way I dressed, the way I allowed others to treat me, and the decisions I made. This place will cause you to put people in their correct “seat” in your life. You will realize that you had folks in the front row that need to be in the balcony! Maybe even in the lobby with no ticket! Sometimes we connect with others through pain and insecurities–when that part of you heals that connection is broken. You can continue to try to keep it, but God will continue to show you things that further prove that point. During this time, you have to protect your process, your peace, and your purpose. Let’s unpack that.

During your process, you’re putting together the pieces. You may not understand, so it’s impossible to expect someone else to understand. It’s YOUR process. This is an opportunity to assess situations, learn about yourself and those around you, and allow God to reveal who He needs you to be. The process can be a daunting and sometimes lonely place. The company you keep during this time can either push you forward, push you backwards, or keep you stuck. Just trying to live a life pleasing to God can convict and intimidate others, but that’s not your battle to fight. They have to want more of Him for themselves. They can either follow you as you follow Christ, or you will have to move their “seat”. Because everyone couldn’t be close to your process, all they know is who you were. They have no idea who you have evolved into! This requires you to retrain people how to treat you. During my emergence of self-esteem issues, I had someone tell me “you don’t act like you think you’re ugly anymore.” Mind you, it was not in a celebratory tone. Ummmm there were so many ways that could have been addressed, at that moment I put up my church finger in my head and moved that “seat.”  You can still love them, they just can’t be close to your process! You owe no one an explanation for your healthy growth! Some people like you better broken, it makes their broken places look healthy.

Now let’s talk about peace. Peace is an inward sense of completeness, wholeness, and calmness. This is the peace that God gives. Having peace does not mean that everything is going perfect, it does mean that you have the perspective that God is healing, working, and moving even though our results are not tangible. If those around you have beliefs or opinions that are contrary to what you believe to be true about your situation, they can ruin your peace. There have been many conversations that have been cut short for the sake of my peace! Especially when I was out of work. When people don’t understand how you are coping with a situation they would almost die in, they come for your peace! Your peace irritates people! Don’t let them take it, girl! You can gracefully shut down someone that tries to attack something you are trying to protect.

Lastly, we have to protect our purpose. Your process leads you to your purpose. How you handle your process determines your tenacity to pursue your purpose. This is why you have to protect your peace because it helps you handle things well. Every situation, issue, and disappointment has led me to this place. I haven’t always protected my process, peace, or purpose. When you know better, you do better. My purpose demands that there are some relationships and conversations I can’t entertain. There are activities I can’t be attached to and places I probably shouldn’t go. Those things may not be conducive to my purpose or the ones attached to it. Your purpose is not just about you! It’s about those God has called you to lead or serve. People will sometimes watch your life and use it as a model of how they should follow Christ. You can be dripping with anointing, but if your moral character isn’t right you lose trust and credibility and still end up ineffective. How does your life look in the lens of someone that wants to grow in Christ? Can they see your light? Are you bearing fruit?

One thing about a process is that it can be continual. We may be in one process now, and in another in a matter of months. We should constantly be evolving and growing. Once we conquer one mountain we should be like “God what’s next, what else do I need to work on or give up? How can I work on this character flaw?” We often want to bypass the process. As painful or awkward as it may be, it is essential to our development towards our purpose. God does not use me because I don’t complain about my process, because I do everything right, because my face has been delivered, or because my thoughts are just full of the Lord. He uses me because I am willing to be used. As reluctant as I can be, I still yield to Him. I open myself up to allow Him to pour into me so that I can pour into others.

So, what will your emergence look like? Everyone’s emergence will look different, and prayerfully there will be many emergence moments in our lives as we continue to transform and grow in God. I am so thankful for my many emergence moments. Without them, you would not be reading this. I wanted to be invisible. I was perfectly fine with none of you knowing anything about me. I’m one of those “the less you know about me, the better we get along” type of girls. I wanted to walk around blind and deaf to what was around me so I didn’t have to feel or live up to what God had for me to do. Those mentalities would have left me in my dark places, so I would never be able to help someone else come out of theirs. My need to be obedient superseded my need to just be left alone.

I had to learn to protect those areas in order to continue to grow, learn and develop into my full potential. Just like there are some that were waiting for me to produce this blog, someone is waiting for you to walk in your purpose as well. Someone needs to know how you made peace in your process and how it led you to your purpose. We have to be the key that unlocks someone else’s prison. I WISH I had this resource, but instead He has given me beauty for my ashes and is allowing me to BE the resource. I pray that God continues to be with us in the process by giving us His perfect peace. That He would lead us to seek Him for what He needs us to do in the earth that only we can do. That we would protect that very thing and be a good steward over what He has us to do and the people connected to it. Let’s emerge y’all!

Welcome to the November blog post my loves!! This will actually be the last post of the year, however, there will be a December podcast. I have started a new year of life recently, and I always tend to reflect a lot around my birthday. Every year of reflection has not been pleasant, but this year, even with the uncertainties, pain, and loss this year has brought I have to say I am thankful. For all of you!

I recently received a text from someone very special to me and they were saying how proud they were of me and they reminded me of how I was years ago in comparison to now. I was so overwhelmed! I was reminded of that girl and was almost in tears. There has been so much growth that has taken place in my life over the last few years, and you all have helped me through the process! This platform has caused me to heal and grow in areas that I didn’t even know were broken or that needed growth. It’s like another form of therapy. Although it was a great sacrifice, I had no idea that just by stepping out and being obedient, that God would use my own words to heal me. You all have been able to witness me in some very vulnerable moments, and for that I say thank you!

As I was writing I was reminded of a song by CeCe Winans called Alabaster Box. Make sure you listen to it, and allow yourself permission to cry! I loved the song and heard of the story in the Bible, but I figured there was something for me to explore. God is intentional like that. This particular account I am referencing is found in Luke 7:36-50. Jesus was invited to dinner with a group of Pharisees. For context, the Pharisees were a religious group. They were known for being self-righteous. There was a woman that was known for living a “sinful” life that came when she heard Jesus was there. Imagine the stares and whispers she got going to a place where everyone else seemed better because they had not committed the sins she had. She proves to be very courageous and her risk was great.

She came with an alabaster box filled with expensive oil. An alabaster box is usually made with marble or onyx, both are very expensive stones. It was shaped like a flask and sealed to keep the fragrance inside, typically once opened, it was to be used all at once. The woman stood behind Jesus at His feet weeping, she began to wet His feet with her tears. Then she wiped them with her hair, kissed them and poured perfume from her alabaster box on them. Simon judged her to himself, but Jesus knew what he was secretly saying and had a lesson for him! Simon was judging her for two reasons, one being that she was a sinner. The second reason was because that perfume was expensive and she could have used it elsewhere or sold it. Jesus gave Simon a parable to help him understand her need for Him. He basically stated that if a two individuals owe someone money, one $500 and one $50, if he forgives their debt, which would be more thankful? Of course the person that owes $500 should be much more thankful.

He told Simon that the way she greeted Him was the way he should have greeted Him. He knew the power of Jesus first hand, while she had just heard. Jesus forgave her because she understood that she needed Him. She sacrificed something so precious and expensive, not even knowing how she would be received by Him. That inspired me sooo much! She brought her sacrifice and He granted her forgiveness and wholeness. She lavished her love on Him because she understood just how much she needed His forgiveness. Sis, does that sound like us? If you won’t say amen, I will!

As Cece says, she came to pour her praise on Him like oil. The oil of our lives is expensive. No one knows the cost of the oil in our alabaster box! No one knows the cost of what we have endured to be who we are as well as who we are becoming! We are all precious creations carrying around the oil of God’s glory! We were created to be glory carriers, but we have to stay connected to Him, lavishing him with love and adoration, and sharing our alabaster moments with others so they may overcome as well.

Though this may seem like a small sacrifice to you, God sees my need of Him by sharing these vulnerable moments with you. I have always been very closed off, letting no one in and nothing out, so to me it is a HUGE leap of faith. He is allowing me to be forgiven, forgive myself, and forgive others through this entity. He is allowing me to be in a place of self-discovery and transparency where I CANNOT AFFORD to be without His love and forgiveness. As I am pouring out my oil, He is renewing, refreshing, and replenishing. Showing me more areas where I need His grace and I need to apply His grace to others. I often feel like the above mentioned woman when I am pouring out the things I have held so close, not knowing how others will perceive my thoughts, feelings, or truth. I thank you for walking with me, reading, supporting, and not judging my sacrifice as I pour my oil.

I pray that we all see ourselves in this nameless woman. That we will recognize our need for Him and develop an intimacy that will change our lives. I pray that we will be intentional about making time to be intimate with God. Time that will provide us with healing, freedom, peace, and joy. That we will lavish our love on Him. That we come with the intention to give him all the oil in our vials, no matter who is watching! That we will be replenished as we go forth to shake up the world. Amen! Have a wonderful Holiday Season, no matter how that looks this year. I love you all and I am eternally thankful for you!