Welcome to the November blog post my loves!! This will actually be the last post of the year, however, there will be a December podcast. I have started a new year of life recently, and I always tend to reflect a lot around my birthday. Every year of reflection has not been pleasant, but this year, even with the uncertainties, pain, and loss this year has brought I have to say I am thankful. For all of you!

I recently received a text from someone very special to me and they were saying how proud they were of me and they reminded me of how I was years ago in comparison to now. I was so overwhelmed! I was reminded of that girl and was almost in tears. There has been so much growth that has taken place in my life over the last few years, and you all have helped me through the process! This platform has caused me to heal and grow in areas that I didn’t even know were broken or that needed growth. It’s like another form of therapy. Although it was a great sacrifice, I had no idea that just by stepping out and being obedient, that God would use my own words to heal me. You all have been able to witness me in some very vulnerable moments, and for that I say thank you!

As I was writing I was reminded of a song by CeCe Winans called Alabaster Box. Make sure you listen to it, and allow yourself permission to cry! I loved the song and heard of the story in the Bible, but I figured there was something for me to explore. God is intentional like that. This particular account I am referencing is found in Luke 7:36-50. Jesus was invited to dinner with a group of Pharisees. For context, the Pharisees were a religious group. They were known for being self-righteous. There was a woman that was known for living a “sinful” life that came when she heard Jesus was there. Imagine the stares and whispers she got going to a place where everyone else seemed better because they had not committed the sins she had. She proves to be very courageous and her risk was great.

She came with an alabaster box filled with expensive oil. An alabaster box is usually made with marble or onyx, both are very expensive stones. It was shaped like a flask and sealed to keep the fragrance inside, typically once opened, it was to be used all at once. The woman stood behind Jesus at His feet weeping, she began to wet His feet with her tears. Then she wiped them with her hair, kissed them and poured perfume from her alabaster box on them. Simon judged her to himself, but Jesus knew what he was secretly saying and had a lesson for him! Simon was judging her for two reasons, one being that she was a sinner. The second reason was because that perfume was expensive and she could have used it elsewhere or sold it. Jesus gave Simon a parable to help him understand her need for Him. He basically stated that if a two individuals owe someone money, one $500 and one $50, if he forgives their debt, which would be more thankful? Of course the person that owes $500 should be much more thankful.

He told Simon that the way she greeted Him was the way he should have greeted Him. He knew the power of Jesus first hand, while she had just heard. Jesus forgave her because she understood that she needed Him. She sacrificed something so precious and expensive, not even knowing how she would be received by Him. That inspired me sooo much! She brought her sacrifice and He granted her forgiveness and wholeness. She lavished her love on Him because she understood just how much she needed His forgiveness. Sis, does that sound like us? If you won’t say amen, I will!

As Cece says, she came to pour her praise on Him like oil. The oil of our lives is expensive. No one knows the cost of the oil in our alabaster box! No one knows the cost of what we have endured to be who we are as well as who we are becoming! We are all precious creations carrying around the oil of God’s glory! We were created to be glory carriers, but we have to stay connected to Him, lavishing him with love and adoration, and sharing our alabaster moments with others so they may overcome as well.

Though this may seem like a small sacrifice to you, God sees my need of Him by sharing these vulnerable moments with you. I have always been very closed off, letting no one in and nothing out, so to me it is a HUGE leap of faith. He is allowing me to be forgiven, forgive myself, and forgive others through this entity. He is allowing me to be in a place of self-discovery and transparency where I CANNOT AFFORD to be without His love and forgiveness. As I am pouring out my oil, He is renewing, refreshing, and replenishing. Showing me more areas where I need His grace and I need to apply His grace to others. I often feel like the above mentioned woman when I am pouring out the things I have held so close, not knowing how others will perceive my thoughts, feelings, or truth. I thank you for walking with me, reading, supporting, and not judging my sacrifice as I pour my oil.

I pray that we all see ourselves in this nameless woman. That we will recognize our need for Him and develop an intimacy that will change our lives. I pray that we will be intentional about making time to be intimate with God. Time that will provide us with healing, freedom, peace, and joy. That we will lavish our love on Him. That we come with the intention to give him all the oil in our vials, no matter who is watching! That we will be replenished as we go forth to shake up the world. Amen! Have a wonderful Holiday Season, no matter how that looks this year. I love you all and I am eternally thankful for you!

Hello sweets! Welcome to October’s blog post! I can’t believe we are almost at the end of 2020! I can understand that some of us are kinda ready for a do over and praying for some normalcy. This month I am going to share with you some epiphanies I have experienced and how they have caused me to correct some of my thought processes. So, one day I was walking with my friend in her neighborhood. We were approaching some ladies and it was a little obvious that one of them was not going to speak. My friend is ultra friendly so she spoke anyway, one spoke and I spoke back, but as we walked away I said “Liberties”. My friend asked for an explanation and I basically said we shouldn’t get offended as we all have liberties. The lady was using her liberty of not having to speak, and I was allowing her to have that. That was the first time I ever used liberties in that context. I probably haven’t said the word since I was helping my niece learn the Constitution song! I had no idea that the very next week I would need to understand that term more deeply to make better decisions concerning my next moves.

The next week, I was listening to a podcast called “Dear Future Wifey.” It’s amazing, you guys should check it out. There was a guy on there and while he was talking I had my own personal epiphany. I literally said LIBERTIES out loud! Liberty by definition is “A state of being free from oppressive restrictions imposed by authority on one’s way of life, behavior, or political views.” It is a right or priviledge. Here is where I realized I need to apply “liberties” to my life.

I immediately thought of two areas that I needed to work on my personal application of “Liberties.” Both of them have a common root of rejection. First, I struggle with having hard conversations. I know, that is a part of life! I am always concerned about how the other person will feel, but what about my feelings? I realized that I should have the liberty to express my feelings and truth openly without feeling that I am rejecting or offending them. I am usually projecting my rejection issues on them. They may be ok with what I say, as long as the delivery is articulated peacefully. I heard a freeing statement that says “You are not responsible for how someone manages your truth.” This means we don’t carry the responsibility of managing our emotions and theirs. People may not agree or understand, you just have the liberty to set boundaries or show people what hurts in your world. We do have the responsibility of making sure we view all aspects and check ourselves as well to make sure we are in line with the truth of the word. It should be delivered appropriately and the ultimate goal should be peace.

I recently had to have a hard conversation with someone. I thought I articulated it well verbally, but apparently I wasn’t clear enough. It took a few weeks for me to gather the courage, but since I am a much better written communicator, I decided to do it that way. It took way more prepping than it should have, but I did it. The response was one of approval and understanding, but I had to free myself of how they handled what I wrote knowing I had done so in a respectable way. I exercised my liberties, and it was truly liberating.

The next area is one that I realized I have been doing all my life. I would disqualify myself before I would give someone else the opportunity to agree or disagree. I didn’t allow others to have the liberty to accept or provide opportunities, because I didn’t want to deal with the rejection. Looking back, I can see the areas where I either sabotaged situations or simply concealed my desires because the actions or words of others were filtered through my wounds. This caused me to make decisions for them, which was usually no. I would always say that I don’t believe in self-inflicted pain, but I had been doing that all along! So I realized that I needed to make sure that not only did I allow others to have to have the liberty to make their decision, but I need to embrace it. No matter how that looks. Do you know how many healthy friendships, relationships, and connections I could have made if I would have just been open enough to receive? If I would have let others exercise their liberties?

This is difficult and takes work. It means actually putting yourself in a space for someone to hurt you. Y’all that’s hard, but it’s the only way! Every relationship carries a risk of hurt or rejection, even parental and marital relationships. Hard conversations have to be had and liberties have to be given as well as received. It just takes asking God for discernment, trusting God with people instead of trusting them, and being open to the possibilities. Everyone doesn’t have ill intentions. Everyone is not a predator. God gives us the opportunities to make healthy connections often, but we usually fail because of our wounds and reluctance. I personally, had to make the decision that healthy connections are needed, so I have to do the soul work to heal and allow access to others with guidance from God.

The opposite of liberties is bondage. I had no idea that restricting the liberties of myself and others left me in a bound state. Now that I have learned, I can’t correct the past, but I can embrace opportunities to exercise my liberties and welcome the liberties of others, whatever that looks like. Zig Ziglar said it best when he said “You cant keep punishing yourself for something that you didn’t know until you learned it.” When you know better, you do better.

I pray that this has blessed someone and allows us to come out of bondage to embrace our liberties and the liberties of others. I pray that we can allow ourselves the freedom to speak our truth in love. That we seek God for the right words as we share what hurts, words seasoned with salt and truth of God’s word. Help us to see those hard conversations as tools to sharpen us as we are accountable and hold others accountable. I pray that as we guard our hearts by the leading of the Holy Spirit we will build healthy boundaries, not walls, that will cover us as we enter into relationships and acquaintances. Help us to heal so we hear what others say from a place of health, not through our wounds. Father, show us where we have not been using our liberties and help us to gain freedom. The freedom to grow, evolve, and welcome the amazing things you have planned for us. Amen!

PS: Broken To Beautiful is now also a PODCAST!!! Please check out Episode 1 on mybrokentobeautiful.com as well as Spotify, Apple Podcast, and Google Podcast platforms!! So excited to share this new venture with you all! Blessings!